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Tuesday, March 23, 2010

ONE OF THE GIRLS?


"Twins", originally uploaded by roy_mac_an_iarla.

Once again, our boys have brought forth an issue with one of my posts. Yesterday's entry in reference to the Dar Williams' song WHEN I WAS A BOY, was met with the flip side to the coin. While us girls were told as children to "not act like boys" and to sweeten ourselves up to what our culture thinks girls should be all about, boys had just the opposite...

"Don't throw like a girl!"
"Are you crying like a girl?"

We have all heard these and many more expressions of the like. Not to even mention how sexist these sayings are, they carry a connotation to them that is actually insulting to both girls (what's wrong with throwing like a girl?!) and guys (are you saying I am not a real guy?!). Boys were told from early on not to express their emotions, to suppress feelings and act like "little men." Perhaps that is why, when trying to share with your boyfriend your thoughts, it can feel like talking to a slab of concrete (a cute slab of concrete, I am sure). Our culture tells us that girls are supposed to feel their emotions, but express them in a lady like way. Guys are supposed to not allow feelings to get in the way of their manhood, so many of them have learned to shut down. No wonder we don't know how to talk to each other!

After all, Mother Goose has told generations of kids that us girls are made of sugar and spice and all things nice, while boys are composed of snips and snails, and puppy dog tails.

Who has it worse? I think that we both have equally been screwed up by society, but you decide.

1 comment:

Unknown said...

one hilarious flip of "throw like a girl" type statements is the Girlie Situps Series invented by Bronwyn Sims and Elsie & Serenity Smith (http://nimblearts.org/)
It is a rolling, curving, power based sit up series that will quickly make one wish they had never jumped to an "easier" assumption!