"I'm just a little bit caught in the middle. Life is a maze and love is a riddle." -Lenka, THE SHOW
After some thought, I felt that I needed to devote two entries to the rapidly approaching Valentine's Day. I was going to gloss over the occasion, but then realized doing so would make me a real wuss. If I want all of you to get involved with this blog and share what your thoughts are, I need to be honest to my true self too. While it is easy to talk about how much we hate it, I think most of us really do want to find love and experience the full cheese factor of the holiday.
Have you ever been in love? I have, many times over, or at least I thought I was. Recently, my mom found a box in the attack of a ton of childhood belongings from when I was little. In it was an anthology of poetry by middle schoolers all around the US that a poem I had written was included in. I had completely forgotten about it, and flipped through the pages until I saw my name. What I had written was the sappiest poem imaginable (I will spare you by not sharing it here) to my then crush, who I was fairly certain was my soul mate, even though this was seventh grade. That guy was my first taste of unrequited love, and man did it hurt back then. I have always been a cheese ball. Now that anthology of middle school poetry sits gathering dust again on the top of my closest shelf and that guy I wrote the poem about has come out of the closet. Life is ironically hilarious.
Since writing that poem, I have seriously had my heart broken a few times and probably broke a couple in the process. Now, I am lucky to have found a guy who gets me, and loves me for the crazy girl that I am.
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I remember Valentine's Day in high school. My high school used to let people pay to send carnations out, to be delivered during second hour. All of the popular girls would be smiling broadly, their arms full or carnations of all colors. I never got one and for me it was a harder day than usual to be such a misfit. Not that anyone really noticed me anyway, looking back on it. One year when I was a junior, I had a boyfriend. To be honest, I wasn't crazy about him but it was fun to be dating someone. And wow, he sent me a red carnation. I opened up the card and it said 'Will you marry me? Love, Stan'....SO not what I was expecting to see! I felt horrible at the prospect of rejecting him and was so upset all day long. When I saw him and thanked him, he said that the proposal was a joke. Which wasn't so cool either...so I decided then that maybe not getting a carnation really wasn't the worst thing!
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